Inspiration: To continue to fine tune my desires.
Have you ever had a completely, weird, disastrous date? Well, most recently, a good friend of mine had. Not that it was bad, it was just UNBELIEVABLE!!!
A woman he met through a friend asked if he would like to have lunch. She happened to be a chef, an amazing natural kinda cook who preferred "organic" ingredients. In my naive days, I thought that "organic" eating and people who were, were normal, so to speak. More grounded more zen. As I got older, wiser, I realized there are all kinds.This is in no way a judgment, just a fact.:)
As, I tend to keep these musings clean, please forgive me if this turns into something a bit raunchy at moments, as when I scribe, it is a stream of consciousness flowing forwards.:-) So this woman arrives at my friends house and stirs up a fabulous lunch. As this guy has been a radio broadcaster and interviewer of some very famous rock icons, he loves to find out more about others. So he asks her the question, "What are you most proud of?" According to him, she hemmed and hawed for a good five minutes or so. Then she reveals the following:
"I am most proud of the time I was on the Howard Stern Show, as the naked chef!" I can only imagine how wide his eyes opened (and he has beautiful, big, blue ones) when she began to utter these words. She then went into some story:
Howard was not happy with me, or something to that effect and she was thrown off the set. She later came back on set when Kid Rock was there and was standing naked, while cupcakes were being thrown at her. She even seemed to enjoy this for some reason, although she said the frosting could have been better tasting.
Anyway, a few more encounters on her part, some kray kray behavior and you get the rest. So my dear friend asks me, "Tell me what I did to attract this?" I had to go inside myself for a moment and don't think I gave him the BEST answer; my true feelings.. So initially I say, knowing him quite well (or at least I think), "There is a part of you that doesn't want a commitment, You say you do, but don't want to get married and need a lot of space." I then go onto say, " Your energy is all over the place, so you are attracting this chaos as a reflection, parts of who you are, where your energy is going.." I also told him that you have to be clear about your intentions, create the space to receive.
He deeply took this in. In hindsight, I realized a bit more. We are always presented with a mirror of ourselves. What is reflected in the outside world is a reflection of what is going on in our interior. So for him, there may be a desire for intimate connection, but a larger part fears it. (Sorry babe). From my own personal experience, we have to make peace with our past, our hurts, our wounding and forgive; to allow for our beautiful desires to move forward. We are consistently shown this in our external world.
So if you take a good look at the people and events going on in your life, this is an indication, a snapshot of your energy. Are you happy with what you see? If not, you have the POWER to change it. This is an "inside" job...No matter what, you are safe, you are loved and have the ability to shift anything that no longer serves you. Always; in all ways.
With Love, Denise